used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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