gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
