butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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