i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
