called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
Randomize
