Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
i think im in europe. pls send help
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