Whod you bang
id be glad to
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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