I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
