Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Randomize
