this beer tastes like vomit already
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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