Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
I would ride that face into the sunset
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
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