Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
