i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
