Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
No more Irish car bombs ever.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
I almost had to fight a bird, and you know how scared I am of birds. It found that Percocet that I lost in the grass last week, I threw out my back when I launched myself at that little fucker.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
