He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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