butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Randomize