I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Dude, I need a lifestyle change. I'm to old to be making out with chicks in foam parties, letting older chicks get all excited because I let them put their hands up my shirt, and running around doing scavenger hunts with 18 yr old chicks.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
Randomize
