Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Randomize
