So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize
