last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
