Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Randomize
