I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
COCAINE IS GR8
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Randomize
