the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize
