At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
