dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Randomize
