And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
