i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
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