What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Randomize
