First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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