Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Randomize
