You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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