Don't you send me to vm
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Randomize
