I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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