Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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