At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
It's official drugs can't kill me
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize