I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
