i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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