found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
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