I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
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