Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
in your professional opinion, what's the most elegant way of saying "sorry I spent all night flirting with you, I thought you were gay" ?
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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