Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
What's the name of that girl you hooked up with? The one that looks like the fire hose sign.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
