That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
MANGO MOTHERFUCKING GODDAMN MARGARITA DELICIOUSNESS
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
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