How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Last night was an abortion. I might need a publicist.
i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
Randomize
