Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
did i just pee glitter
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
