How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
he shaved USA in his pubs
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
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