Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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