I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
