You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
Randomize
