Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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