i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
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